Mindset #1

Hands holding Sparklers

Hello! After a few month hiatus … time really flies when you love what you do – I am happy to be back sending you some thoughts today! I really want to take some time and talk mindset. For many of us, the shift into Fall can be a private and cozy one. We choose our own form of hibernation and (especially in the Pacific Northwest) hunker down for the chillier days ahead.

I want you to take a moment to think about the mindset you are bringing with you into this time of year. I am asking because the mindset that we stoke this time of year, REALLY sets the foundation for the next year to come.

First, let’s define so we are all on the same page.

mindset mind·set or mind-set (mīnd’sět’) n. A fixed mental attitude or disposition that predetermines a person’s responses to and interpretations of situations. An inclination or a habit.

What is the first word that comes up for you when you think about your current mindset? Protective? Open? Nourishing? Driven? Dedicated? Take a moment and jot down that first word at the top of a blank sheet of paper.

Now, did you know that any change we want to make in our lives is 80% mindset and only 20% the actual mechanics of change. That’s right … Mindset is huge because mindset = outcome. One of the reasons it is so huge is because once we have a mindset our thoughts have a tricky way of collecting evidence to solidify that perspective. This is how our mindset becomes like CONCRETE and why it is a good idea to check in on what is becoming fixed or rigid in our perspective.

Over the next several weeks I want to work through 3 mindsets that I see everyday in my practice. These are 3 mindsets that tend to really get people stuck and stagnant over time, especially when it comes to health and vitality.

Mindset #1 : I am alone.
Evidence Collected : “No one cares, why should I? Connection is exhausting. No one understands my experience. I can’t trust anyone. This is my struggle. What works for other people, doesn’t work for me. It is easier to be alone than vulnerable.”
Pattern Interrupt :  I am a unique and integral part of something greater than myself. Everything is waiting for me. I am always connected to the world around me. I do not have to seek this out, it already is. With every breath out, I offer some of myself and with every breath in, I take in some of the ecology around me.

The mindset of being alone is a death nail in progress. It causes us to fall asleep to the present moment, to our curiosity, to the possibility of connection. It slips us into a dangerous place where what we do doesn’t seems to matter.

WHAT WE DO IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS.

How we spend our time, how we serve others, how we care for ourselves is what matters. And it all starts with mindset.

Go back to your mindset that you wrote down. What evidence surrounds it? Is it helpful to you? Or could it use a shift? What is your pattern interrupt?

I will leave you today with one of my favorite poems called Everything is Waiting for You by David Whyte.

Your great mistake is to act the drama

as if you were alone. As if life

were a progressive and cunning crime

with no witness to the tiny hidden

transgressions. To feel abandoned is to deny

the intimacy of your surroundings. Surely,

even you, at times, have felt the grand array;

the swelling presence, and the chorus, crowding

out your solo voice. You must note

the way the soap dish enables you,

or the window latch grants you freedom.

Alertness is the hidden discipline of familiarity.

The stairs are your mentor of things

to come, the doors have always been there

to frighten you and invite you,

and the tiny speaker in the phone

is your dream-ladder to divinity.

Put down the weight of your aloneness and ease into the

conversation. The kettle is singing

even as it pours you a drink, the cooking pots

have left their arrogant aloofness and

seen the good in you at last. All the birds

and creatures of the world are unutterably

themselves. Everything is waiting for you.

Until next time… I hope you enjoy